Top 10 Reasons to have Crazy Running Friends

I can't truly put into words what it has meant to have Becky, and all of you crazy running chicks, as a part of my life for the last few years. But it comes down to this-- I am constantly amazed at your awesomeness. This awesomeness has been on my mind a lot recently, so I am going to try to express what it means to have you, and why every woman should seek out friends like you. Yes you. All of you. Each of you. 

Okay, maybe you don't run all the time. Maybe knitting is more your thing. Or shopping. But whatever it is, I hope you have best buddies who enjoy you and enjoy spending time doing these things with you. Just replace "running" with whatever it is you like best.

10. There is no competition among crazy running friends. When you have real  friends, awesome mature friends, they only want what's best for you. That means they don't hold you back, and they aren't constantly trying to one-up you. 

9. They wake you up at 5:30 in the morning and it's normal. Not like in a college-drinking-binge-stumbling-in-walk-of-shame kind of way. But in a "Let's get out there and greet the beautiful world!" kind of way. The second way is totally awesomer.

8. You can talk about everything. E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. I always say, you can't run carrying your baggage. You have to let it go before you can have a good run. This might mean you're crying 5 miles into a run (it's happened) and it might mean you have to tell your friend that she has to drop her issues out on the side of the road and leave them there (such a good visualization technique) and it might mean you know WAAAAAAYY too much about your friends' sex lives and the town gossip.

7. Your running friends love you no matter if you have accomplished 2 miles or 20. We ALL know the pain of those first 5 minutes. We respect everything it takes just to pry yourself off of the couch. We are not running snobs-- we are proud of each other. Supportive. Always. 

6. Your running friends would rather run a slow, bad run with you than leave you behind. There have been more and more off days since I have been having issues with my IT band. And I always always always struggle up hills. No one has ever really left me behind. I mean, there are times when I had to cut Becky loose because I was just walking. But the fact is, she would never have just said, "Look, I gotta run faster than this. You're sucking today." In my young and immature days, I admit, I dropped some friends because they weren't keeping up with my obnoxious shop-party-boy-crazy-obnoxiousness. Downright embarrassing to look back on that. I hope running has taught me, and I hope I can pass on to my daughter, we just don't treat people that way. 

5. You become friends with people you probably never would have met otherwise. We have met some AMAZING, INSPIRING, AWESOME people in this crazy running adventure. I would never have pushed myself to go talk to some of you if we didn't have this shared torture/pain/pleasure of running in common. 

4. Breakfast with friends. Breakfast with friends is one of my most favorite things in my whole entire life. Ever. My priorities in life are: God, Family, Coffee, Breakfast with friends. No wait. Books. Then Breakfast with friends. I don't know how or why to describe this. But it's just the yummiest food, and the best way to start your day, right? One time, Lisa made us brunch with homemade waffles and lil smokies. And that was one of the best days in my life. Another time, after I ran the Fargo Marathon Relay with Patty and Anna, we went to Denny's and had breakfast (Because they serve it ALL DAY) and I remember THAT more than I actually remember the run! And finally, my friend Catherine makes THE BEST breakfast burritos and gathering at her house for breakfast is.... hmmm.... it's 9:15, I wonder if she's busy..... so you know what my point is? It's not just the food. It's just that great feeling, the good memories, the gorgeous sunshiny start to your day with the amazing people in your life. And pancakes.

3. Your running friends are committed to you. Because no one wants to be that girl who can't be relied on to show up. 

2. Shared endorphin rush. I think this is a huge contributing factor to why we love each other so much. You never walk away from each other mad or angry or impatient. You're always on a runners high when you say goodbye. You're plastered in sweat and complaining about blisters but you're still high-fiving each other with a huge smile on your face. 

1. Courage. Strength. Respect. Running friends bring out the best in you. Somehow, running got me physically back into shape, but it also molded my life back into shape. I have more patience. I know that nothing is impossible if I work towards it, and I work better with the support and encouragement of my running wife. My best running friend pushed me to things I never thought possible and it's been my relationship with her that really changed me for the better. I found, in myself, characteristics I thought I had lost for a while. Discipline-- I used to always think I was the flaky one who never stuck with anything-- jobs, hobbies. But my consistency in running showed me that I have just been a late bloomer. Courage-- I never imagined doing what we do now. Patience- There is no way to hurry up a 20 miler without hurting yourself. You just settle in for the long haul. And fortunately, this frame of mind has transposed into my parenting, my work. Sometimes you just have to settle in and work towards the finish without yelling at people to hurry up! And finally, and this goes back to #10-- I just don't want to compete with you, I want to see that HUGE smile on your face, and read your facebook posts, when you've accomplished your best. When you set PRs, I don't care if I am ahead or behind you. When you're out there having a bad day but you ran anyway, I know you're doing the best thing for you and I am just happy to share in some of that! 

Fargo 2013.
Having run together for 3+ years now, we have probably logged THOUSANDS of miles together.
Still doesn't get old. She still waits for me and I still listen to her. 

I hope that you have friends that help you along the way. Friends who make you push yourself, who laugh and cry and talk for hours. Friends that want the best for you. Friends who make the best memories with you!

Happy Running, Crazy Running Friends!

~Jen

Body Image

I have so many thoughts about body image, it's hard to know where to start a blogpost on it. In fact, it's a subject I have long avoided because it's SO sensitive and SO controversial. But for heaven's sake, the only reason it is, is because we make it so. Us girls. To each other and to ourselves.

I want to relay a conversation I had with my daughter on this subject. She was only 9 at the time. It was a horrific moment for me, yet I can only hope that I handled it correctly. In this conversation, Katie is still a scrawny 9 year old, and VERY active-- biking, running, hiking, dancing. So I can either point out her physical beauty, or take a HUGE risk and see if I can stop the chatter about physical beauty and sizes..... I encourage *you* to listen closely....


Kate, slapping her thighs: I have fat thighs. Look at all that blubber. Look at how they jiggle.
Me: that's because your thigh muscles are soft and relaxed, they aren't jiggling, they are absorbing the impact of you slapping them, of course they are going to move.
Kate: I hate my legs. They are ugly with all of their scars and my fat thighs....

Me: sigh.... look, do you want to be the girl who has perfect, plastic, shiny, legs, or do you want to be the girl who has adventures and stories to tell? Every scar tells a story, do you want to be the girl who says "Oh, I got this scar when I skinned my knee when I was out bike riding, I got this scar when I was out hiking in the Badlands, I got this scar from sliding into homeplate" or do you want to just have perfect legs from staying inside and never doing anything? Do you want skinny little legs or do you want powerful, strong, legs that can finish a 5K and can go out for sunset hiking and ride bike for 5 miles? Do you want to be the girl who looks perfect or do you want to be the girl who has adventures?

Kate: Oh, I want to be the girl who has adventures.

My beautiful little legacy

.... so now I ask you: what do you really want? When it comes to your fitness goals, what's your real goal? To look perfect or to cross the finish line?

My mom's legacy-- 3 generations of active women right there! :) 

To fit the hollywood standard or to set a standard for health and strength for the girls looking up to you? To have a gap in your thighs or to have thighs that carry you to the half-marathon mark? To wear a size two or to wear finisher medals and finisher t-shirts?

Listen to what your inner 9 year old would tell you. Or better yet, listen to your daughters and sons.

Choose to be the girl who has adventures.

Out of Hibernation

Oh heeeeeyyyy.
We're back.

We took a hiatus.

And by "hiatus," I mean we have been suffering the cold dark doldrums that is your existence during winter in North Dakota.

We ran through it but I think I speak for both of us when I say there really hasn't been much HEART in it.

But now it's sort-of-almost "spring" here. I mean, most of "spring" here is still subfreezing temps with the added bonus of 20+ mph winds. But it starts getting kind of sunnier. Like "oh hey, it's nice out" and then you step out and you get slapped in the eyeballs by fierce freezing winds. And then you're like "I HATE the cold and I wish I lived someplace warm and that I could wear skirts and sandals already, F@#K!!!"

So yeah.

Winter Running in North Dakota:

8 December. Hats and face protectors have a layer of ice on them. Becky's mascara froze to her face! 

8 Dec- And my braids were completely frozen! I didn't even realize this until we stopped to take the last photo, and I realized my hair was frozen to my jacket. Crazy, huh? 

January 1-We have to run in circles around our Community Center because it has a 1 mile track that they keep swept clear of snow. It's the only safe running route because of the ice and snow.

12 January. Sunset. At 4:15 in the afternoon. It's pretty. But I miss the sunshine.

29 January. Be jealous.

2 February. ChillyCheeks5K. Raised money for both the Wounded Warrior Project AND the American Cancer Society.
Totally worth the 33 degree temperatures (kind of nice out for February) and 24 mph sustained winds!

That ONE day in March that finally really warms up and gives you hope....

... before it is taken away again. 17 March. March, y'all. Seriously.
(I didn't go running in this. Too blustery. It was a fine, wet snow ALL DAY with something like 20 mph winds. Our friend Lisa, who is an ANIMAL, went out and did 16 miles in this!! )

So that's where we are and where we've been these days. We are often asked if we keep up our training in the winter, and you see, our answer is yes. Our threshold for outdoor training is generally 20 degrees, but that can change if there's too much ice or wind. We wear layers. Lots of thin layers, actually, with our heads and hands covered. Arm warmers under tech jackets and compression cold weather pants under sweats. We keep it around 8-12 miles in the "off season" -- but here in North Dakota, it's not officially not-winter until Memorial Day Weekend. 

And since our first race of the year-- Fargo Marathon-- is May 18th, you have to get started in the cold weather. Fargo Marathon is typically a cool-weather race (no matter how much you are hoping and praying for it to be a tank-top and shorts day, you're always at the starting line in jackets and headwarmers).

I want to end this on a positive note.

I know it looks like I'm complaining and miserably cold. I mean, well, I am. But the thing is-- facing the misery and running through it.... these are the things that make you tough and define you. As a runner, you have to go run. Not wait for tomorrow. Not wait til it warms up. Not wait til you feel like it. Not wait for your running partner to goad you into it. (Okay, nix the last one because I totally make Becky do this for me all the time.) You know the saying (because you've seen it on Pinterest a million times)... if we wait for perfect conditions, we'll never get anything done.

Which is true for everything, not just running. As with anything, finding the get-up-and-go to take the first step out the door, to get your head into the first mile- is the hardest part.

But we persevere. We keep grinding away. We find the inner strength to do what we have to. Because we're all bad-ass in one way or another. We're all strong. We're all fighters and runners and leaders. We're all amazing in our own face-down-our-fears way.

Even when the world around us is cold and dark.

Especially when the world around us is cold and dark.

Be the light. Be the change. Get out there!

Happy Running!

~Jen